I'm artist Vincent Van Gogh too dependent on my brother Theo
I'm Linda Lovelace falling from grace
I'm a child of the 70s trying to have a good time, watching others getting drunk on Boone's Farm wine
I'm David Cassidy making you weak in the knees just by my singing
It's now the 80s and I'm more than ready to get too serious with the wrong guy who turned out to be just another fly by night
Now it's the late 80s, kind of my glory days
Or so I thought, nowadays it's all a bit hazy
I'm comedian John Belushi on "Saturday Night Live," giving you gut-wrenching laughter, but I'm drug-induced.
It won't be long until my funeral they'll all be gathering
I'm Richard Nixon, stop acting so ashamed of my bad deeds
After all, it's you that voted for me
I'm Elvis Presley, passed out by my commode from a drug overdose
I'm John Lennon, a victim of a deranged fan with gun in hand who took my life for no good reason.
• MARY (FARRELL) RIDDLE lives in Ottawa.
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